Conflict Resolution and Negotiation
5
TKI Modes
Competing collaborating compromising avoiding accommodating
2
Axes
Assertiveness × cooperativeness
1
SHRM Preferred
Collaborating for most scenarios
Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Modes
five modes, two axes, one preferred defaultCollaborating (high assertiveness + high cooperativeness) is the SHRM-preferred mode for most scenarios
Competing
High assert, low coop
Collaborating
High assert, high coop
Compromising
Mid assert, mid coop
Avoiding
Low assert, low coop
Accommodating
Low assert, high coop
When to Use Each Mode
Collaborating
When the issue is important to both sides and there is time to find a creative solution that satisfies everyone
Competing
When safety is at stake, a quick decision is critical, or you must enforce an unpopular but necessary policy
Compromising
When time is limited, both parties have equal power, and a partial solution is better than no solution
Accommodating
When the issue matters more to the other person, preserving the relationship is the priority, or you realize you were wrong
Avoiding
When the issue is trivial, there is no chance of winning, or more information is needed before engaging
Mediation vs Arbitration
Mediation
A neutral third party facilitates discussion. The mediator does NOT make a decision. The parties reach their own agreement. Voluntary and non-binding.
Arbitration
A neutral third party hears both sides and MAKES a decision. The arbitrator acts like a private judge. Can be binding or non-binding depending on the agreement.
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Practice NowExam Traps
Collaborating Is Usually the Preferred Answer
On most SJI questions involving conflict, collaborating (high assertiveness plus high cooperativeness) is the answer SHRM wants. It results in a solution that satisfies both parties. Default to this unless the scenario justifies another mode.
Competing Is OK for Safety Issues
When safety is at stake or an immediate decision is required with no time for discussion, the competing mode (high assertiveness, low cooperativeness) is appropriate. The exam will present emergency scenarios to test this.
Avoiding Is OK When the Issue Is Trivial
If the conflict is minor, the stakes are low, and engaging would create more problems than it solves, avoiding is a valid choice. But for significant workplace issues, avoiding is never the right answer.
The Exam Tests Situational Application
Knowing the five modes is not enough. You must identify which mode fits the specific scenario. Read the details carefully. Who is involved, what is at stake, and how urgent is the resolution.
Default to Collaborating
Unless the scenario involves safety (competing) or a trivial issue (avoiding), collaborating is the SHRM-preferred answer.
Two Axes
Assertiveness (how much you push for your own needs) × Cooperativeness (how much you consider the other side). Each mode is a different combination.
You decide where to eat and that is final. Works when you are the only one who knows the area or when the restaurant closes in ten minutes. Does not build goodwill.
You let the other person choose and happily go along. Works when you genuinely do not care or when the relationship matters more than the meal.
Neither of you can agree, so you just cancel plans entirely. Works when you are both too tired to care. Falls apart when someone is actually hungry.
You pick the appetizer, they pick the main. Each side gives something up. Faster than collaborating but neither side is fully satisfied.
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